Frantic Friday : The T & A.... or Rumblin' Stumblin' Bumblin' Edition.... (NSFW)

Well.... It's another Frantic Friday!
So of course we all know what that means!

We here in Bedrock, should be discussing some :


and :


Trust me, it's a service I am entirely willing to provide for you dear reader.

Our weekly dose of some Frantic Friday :


and :


has been known to help me get through the week at times.

Occasionally, I think of nothing but a little :


and :


myself.

Quite often in fact, ( I can honestly admit ) it's all I ever manage to think about!

I say.... whatever helps to get you through the day!

And some day's, can be a bit longer than others. Those days are where a little :


and :


can make all the difference in the world!

But on this Frantic Friday, there are other devious misadventures on the go as well.

You see, Peb's and I are "Rumblin" all the way down South to see a bunch of good friends, probably as you're reading this as a matter of fact.

Our plans are pretty simple.

We should finish off the drive in plenty of time to get ourselves in "Stumblin" condition with the gang, sometime early Saturday afternoon. From that point on all we have to do is celebrate our wedding anniversary, with about 15 to 18 of our closest Mastodon friends.

That debauchery should lead us to the "Bumblin" that will be required, for the 14 hour trip home on Sunday.

I've heard that waking up the Hippie to take him across to Charlotte at 8:00am. Sunday morning, could possibly pose a bit of a challenge! But I've been through worse!

So for today's edition of Frantic Friday, I'm afraid you'll just have to make due with a little bit of :


and :


and hope that it can get you through.... until the next edition of Frantic Friday!

Where :


and :


may just be a factor, once again.

Oh...... and is it just me.... or is Jessica actually an awful lot prettier, when she's not wearing any makeup?


My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Pay as you go I get, BUT DAMN ....

A friend recently had an issue with his cell but thought, no biggie! I'll zip into this little strip mall and use a payphone. A quick trip around the perimeter, resulted in exactly zero payphones located. Surprised just a touch, my buddy figured that the payphones must have been relocated into one of the stores. "Probably for security and safety" he said. So into the first of a series of stores he did wander.

"There's one over near the Gas Station" he was told.

So over to the station he toddled. "Where the hell's the payphone?" he muttered. It was eventually found, just behind the pile of snow pushed back there, by the plows doing the mall parking lot. Thankfully, there was a small foot path just barely visible, leading behind the mound of snow and into the booth. "Success!" my pal proclaimed.

With that he simply dropped his quarter into the phone and would dial the required number, as soon as he had a dial tone of course. He waited, and waited, and waited... no dial tone!

Then he heard a voice, "You have a credit of $0.25 on this phone. For an additional $0.25, a local call may be placed. How do you wish to proceed?"

Me = *blink - - - blink*

I remember as cell phones were becoming smaller in size and WAY more portable, thinking to myself, "no ones ever going to use a pay phone again, now that they jacked the price up from $0.10 to a Quarter!" It just never made sense to me at that time, and it really doesn't now. Why the hell put the price up 100%, when you can't get anyone to use your service anymore anyway? What successful business model is this copying?

Anywho.... apparently it was my turn next.

The Deathmobile™ has developed a slow leak in the front right tire over the last couple of months. Not bad enough to drive me crazy and make it a MUST repair, but enough to get me to make a stop at an air pump say, once a month or so. Yesterday was "air" day for me. So I pulled into the same Gas Station that I have used for this purpose and many, many of my hundreds of fill ups, throughout my 7 years of commuting back and forth to hell. I grab the nozzle and head around to the tire in need of some fresh O. Off comes the valve stem cap and with the proper pressure applied between nozzle and valve stem........... nothing!

Now I know the folks at this station pretty intimately. I see most of them at least three times a week. So I'm going to be the good guy here and let them know their pump done gone and broke. That's just how I roll. So off I stroll to the Self Serve cashier and I say, "Mike. You might want to let someone know that there's something wrong with you air pump right now."

He looks at me with that all too familiar Self Service Gas Station Cashier 'Dear in the Headlights' look and says, "That can't be right! They just did all that work on it yesterday. Damn! Someones gonna' get their butt kicked!"

"Hey Boss! Mike shouts out towards the back office. "Someone busted your new pump already!

As I accompanied the "Boss" back out to the pump, I noticed his muttering and mumbling consisted mostly of four letter adjectives, apparently designed solely for the purpose of descriptive narratives on air pump assembly, and some service technicians family members.

As we arrived at the pump he glanced my way and mumbled, "so what's it doing?"

That was an easy one.... "nothing" I uttered.

After a good thorough looking at and YES, performing the Male equivalent of the Female shaking something broken, a good solid smack of a closed fist down onto the top of the unit, he at first seemed satisfied that I was in fact telling it like it was.

"The damn things brand new and busted already!" he let out with a sigh.

Then he reached down into his pocket and took something out. Far too small to be a tool of any value it seemed to me, but with a couple of flicks of his wrist out in front of that pump, whatever tool he used had brought the pump back to life!

It was at that very moment that I felt "the look" coming in my direction, from the "Boss."

"You're shitting me right?" he said, as I felt his eyes trying to burn deep within my soul.

"What?" I asked.

"Are you fucking serious here? C'mon!" he said, with his back slightly turned to me.

"What the hell are you trying to say exactly my friend? Not the greatest in customer service etiquette lessons you're demonstrating right at this moment Sir." I vented in his general direction.
(Riggs - think kid asking for a smoke!)

"Did you or did you not, put the fifty-cents in the fucking machine?" he growled at me.

ME = *blink- - - blink*

I paused to take in what he'd asked for about ten seconds or so, but it was at that exact moment of realization, that the roles between us two combatants, had reversed to diametrically opposed.

"You're shitting me right?" I said, as I focused my eyes squarely upon his.

"What?" he asked.

"Are you fucking serious here? C'mon!" I screamed. "You want $0.50 for some fucking air! Fifty fucking cent air? Seriously? No really, SERIOUSLY!

Please tell me....

Where have the day's gone, where as a customer pulling up to the business of your choice, you were treated to actual customer service? If you're at the ripe young age of 46 or older, you must remember when you had to actually tell the service station attendants that everything was just fine. They did not have to check your oil, empty your ashtray or take your garbage away and they most certainly did NOT! have to check the air in your tires as a courtesy, every single time you pulled into their little corner of the world!

The business models used today for customer service in general, seriously need to consider an outright enema!

That said, I highly recommend that all consumers consider the service aspect of any purchases they make or plan to make in the remaining time we have on this big flying rock. For if we continue to allow ease and convenience and outright greed of the purveyor's of product to make the decisions for us, we have no right to complain about being shit upon, by any of them that deem it necessary to do so.

= = = =

OH..... and don't even get me started on this crap! I have no idea WTF I was thinking!

If I can undo the total lack of geekiness I carry around with me 24/7 for just long enough to figure out what to do with this stuff. You may be able to follow along with me HERE.

Just don't expect too much.... too soon!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Just me and a half million friends....

That bit about us not really appreciating what we’ve got from yesterday, got me to thinking about how much we really do take for granted. Recently, I’d taken a little time to myself to sit back and collect my thoughts on this whole online Poker phenomenon. As I was about to sit down at another one of the virtual tables, I realized that I was only one of the more than 68,000 folks signed on to this one site at that particular moment. 68,000 !

As I was waiting for the event to fill up, curiosity got the best of me and I had to open up another site. When I did, I was amazed to find another 54,000 players sitting down in that virtual environment as well.

Nearly 125,000 players! That’s a fair sized city all playing Poker on-line.

So as I sat and reflected on numbers of that magnitude, it started to dawn on me that these are only two of the available sites. There are thousands, no wait! Tens of thousands of other players, playing on several of the different sites also available out there. It actually boggles the mind just a little. So this really got me going! I checked in on three other sites and found a total of 170,000 plus playing on them also. I had to start checking into all of the Poker sites I know about. Any idea what the grand total was that I came up with?

On Saturday night at around 10:30 pm EST., there were enough players to be ;

-the general population of the entire state of North Dakota.
Or
-the entire city of Winnipeg, Manitoba.
Or
-all of the folks that live in Surrey and Burnaby, British Columbia combined. Hell, you could throw the folks from Kamloops in there too!

Over 650,000 players were playing Poker on-line!

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me. But I find those numbers to be absolutely unbelievable. The word phenomenon doesn’t seem appropriate or even big enough, all of a sudden.

Doesn’t anyone else find it incredible, how easy it is for us to sign up and sit down for a game of Poker? I mean think about it. In about one minute, you can take part in a game with just about anyone, from just about anywhere at just about anytime.

Let's face it! If you want to play Texas Hold’em, there’s always a game registering where you can play online Poker games.

I guess my point is…..

The world sure has come an awful long way since Atari Pong, hasn’t it?

My sincerest thanks for dropping by….

Just saying it like it is....

"We live in an amazing, amazing world, and it's wasted on the crappiest generation of spoiled idiots." - Louis CK

I'm not sure how I missed this but if you don't recognize that quote either, you've got to go HERE to see the whole thing.

Absolutely genius !!!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Being the Mastodon that I am....

A few of my favorite things are all happening together this coming weekend. The only problem is, they're all happening in G-Vegas. But if you know me, that's not really a problem at all is it!

So.........

We mildly adjust the schedule here and there, perform an oil & filter on the Red-Rubble-Racer and BAM !



(I have mad graphix skillz no!)

If you're looking for me this weekend, forget the dial-a-shot technique. I'll be the one next to you at the bar!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Frantic Friday : The azz expected Edition....(also prolly NSFW)

Knowing that I'm going to sit down and have a drink, (or twelve) with my fellow BB in about a week, I figured I'd better follow up on my promise to help find him some perfect azz.

I didn't want last weeks effort to be left as a mere tease :


I said I'd find the man some :


so I went on a week long journey. My mission, find BadBlood some really, really :


Actually, I took it one step further just for him. I decided to see if I could find him :


that might just be capable, of leaving him :


So I grabbed a :


and headed out the door. Of course, I made sure to give the :


a great big hug and kiss goodbye, before jumping into The Deathmobile™ for the long, but worthwhile journey.

When my excursion started with me noticing a huge :


I knew that this was an omen. Unfortunately for me, this was not just going to be any old :


I wouldn't be hanging out my :


sign, or waiting around to witness the absoloutely breathtaking :


No on this trip, I'd be playing a game of :


and cull her out of the candidates. I'd be telling the ones in the :


that they should have really gone with a :


Then I'd have to tell most of them, that it isn't too much of a :


to see, that I was expecting just a little :


rather than just someone doing another version of :



When I finally came across what I thought just might be the perfect :


I made sure to get a good picture of it for my fellow BB. Oh.... I also had a really nice conversation with her, and found out that :


I figure that should take care of that now, and BadBlood should be seeing nothing but :


wherever his journey may take him, for the rest of his day.

For next Frantic Friday, I've been delving into my own secret favorite pastime, the weather! I'll have some tips on the effects of cold & damp :


and some fantastic tips and tricks, to keep your hands from freezing off.


So until then, have a great weekend everyone and....

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Where did that spark between us go....

In a monumental moment of weakness and stupidity, despite my anger from the day I'd had and knowing full well that I needed to be up and at'em around 4:00am this morning, this idiot signed up for the 10:00pm local mookie last night. There really should be some kind of button or switch that goes off automatically, whenever I think stuff like, "it seemed like a good idea at the time!" Some kind of gizmo that turns the brain back into a functioning unit of some kind, rather than that mass of grey matter that just sits and giggles, while I make stupid decision after stupid decision.

Now it's not the mookie itself I have a problem with, don't get me wrong here. It's my still being awake on a school night, at 1:00am or so that's the issue. If I had every Thursday off, I'd play in every damn mookie I could. There's always a great crowd of friends there, that I wish I could say I got to "see" a lot more than I actually do. Last night was no exception! DoubleD, Numb, Joe Speaker, LJ, Lucko, Carmen, Buddy, Lightning and eventual winner heffmike were all at my table throughout the night. I also ran across Schaubs and IT on the rail as well. I'm sure they were focused on the horses they had remaining in their epic season long wager!

I actually managed to play a little "solid" poker last night, despite my normal tendency to really donk it up in the later evening games. With that solid poker, came one lucky break that anyone needs to advance deep into one of these fields and I also caught a few cards at very fortuitous times as well. Put that all together and, you can be sitting in a good spot on the leader board at first break!


After the first break, there was that run of hands that always seems to occur in any MTT for me. My patience was really put to the test, as a non-stop run of hands like 2-8, 3-10 or even worse, made appearance, after appearance, after appearance.

I was fairly "chatty" at the table, (YES! Even for me!) but I was really trying to pay attention to the play as well. (weird concept, I know!) I thought I saw a few opportunities here and there, where I might be able to represent a tight image with big cards. I tried a shot and it worked out well, getting a pre-flop raiser and caller to fold to my 3x re-raise. Then I saw my second chance to do the same, and it also went as planned. Those two pots were enough to keep me treading water in the blinds. I waited patiently for some playable hands, but they just never seemed to come along. I had my next opportunity to make a move and pulled it off flawlessly. Well, almost flawlessly! Because I was holding "The Bammer," I showed my cards. I know, I know! Stoooooopid!

By second break, I think I was around 8th - 10th in chips. I still couldn't get any real playable hands at the right moments though, so I made a play at Numbono with another Bammer. This time it didn't go so well. His air was just a little better than my air. LOL! That cost me a few too many chips for sure, but man was it funny at showdown! Then it just got silly! As over and over again while I was in the BB, the short stacks kept pushing them all in. I'd be left with calls of two or three hundred and pretty much had to make those calls, no matter what two cards I was holding. This happened four times and I didn't win a single one of them. There goes an extra 1100 or 1200 in chips in four orbits!

Then it really happened.......... all that way to the final twelve out of 54 players and ............ disconnect.
..........................................................................................................................
there was a lot of swearing about here somewhere...................... I'm at a six-handed table with substantial blinds dammit......... CONNECT ALREADY!!!................................ four minutes! It's never taken four minutes to reconnect before!...................... FIVE !!!!............................ SIX..................................

Six minutes that felt like an eternity to me go by, before I get to sit back down at the table. Naturally, my stack is crippled and I come back to any Ace and have to jam. I do not win that race either and I go out in 12th. place.



I love our property and home and I wouldn't trade it for anywhere else that I know of in the world. But occasionally realizing that 79 miles of dial-up is going to have these issues at the wrong time, can be a little hard on the system for certain!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

I don't care....

The first person to talk to me today, (besides my darling wife) set me off on a path of anger and destruction. He is currently available for any employment opportunities he may happen to come across. Each of the next three "people" to approach me, only made it worse. One of whom, has suddenly become unemployed as well. In this day and age and time of uncertainty, stealing from me has to be just about the stupidest decision one could ever make. May heaven take mercy on the next "people" that try and do or say something stupid around me.

I really thought I'd made myself clear at the beginning of the year but just in case, fair warning! I've fuckin' had it with "people."



This could end up being.... a rather long day!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

I run good.... NO? ....

I ran really bad this weekend.

How bad?

How about busting out of ten games with the second nuts.
Yup, bad beats ahead!

The worst of which was where as second high chip stack, I flopped Quad's and got it in on the turn against the tables chip leader. Here's how that hand and for the most part, the rest of my weekend went.

Seat 1: sedera (485)
Seat 2: push_girl (365)
Seat 3: Badowin (1,440)
Seat 4: mity11 (1,425)
Seat 5: BamBamCan (3,155)
Seat 6: SperaK (3,450)
Seat 8: mot0man (1,355)
Seat 9: 1guy4games (1,780)
BamBamCan posts the small blind of 50
SperaK posts the big blind of 100
The button is in seat #4
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to BamBamCan [8h 8s]
mot0man folds
1guy4games folds
sedera folds
push_girl folds
Badowin folds
mighty11 folds
BamBamCan raises to 300
SperaK calls 200
*** FLOP *** [8c Kd 8d]
BamBamCan checks
SperaK bets 555
BamBamCan calls 555
*** TURN *** [8c Kd 8d] [Kh]
BamBamCan checks
SperaK bets 1200
BamBamCan raises to 2300, and is all in
SperaK calls 1100
BamBamCan shows [8h 8s]
SperaK shows [Ks Qs]
*** RIVER *** [8c Kd 8d Kh] [Kc]

Just re-reading that, makes me sick to my stomach.

But it was just one of those weekends. I ran a flopped set into higher flopped set, under-boats got caught by rivered over-boats and I would always be one card short of the nut straight or flush, every time I played them. I was behind in exactly one situation, the flopped sets. I was caught by a dominated hand in all of the other nine games.

Crap like that, just knocks the wind right out of your sails.

So I think I'll rest the rest of this week and take a little break. I don't know when my sails will again feel the breeze of NLHE, but I don't think it'll be anytime too terribly soon to be honest.

AND YOU KNOW I HEAR YOU ZOOKS! IT WAS JUST LIKE THAT FOR ME TOO.

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Almost top 10....

Percent that is!


Pebs ran a $2 buy-in into a nearly top 10% finish in last night's Double Duece. Her $2 buy-in and perserverance during the game paid off however, in the form of winning $50 for her efforts. The language she used when she busted out with K-K vs. A-4, ( to a rivered Ace of course ) is not exactly "Family Day" material I'm afraid.

That's what it is here in Bedrock though, Family Day. What a great idea! Sticking an extra long weekend in the year, right when it's really needed. A little something to break up a long and dreary winter.

We spent the day with Fred and Wilma and had a blast. On the way home, we experienced a bit of Canadiana that couldn't have been scripted any better. Picture a farm field with ice from recently melted snow, covering an area of about 5 Acres. Now imagine the Hockey game that was taking place right there, out in the middle of nowhere. Car's and Van's were just parked along the side of the country road, as the little ones chased pucks, the parents chased the little ones and the sky was a blue that had not been seen for a very, very long time. It was one of those moments when I really wished I had my skates and stick. The smiles on the faces of everyone from the kids to the parents, might just have been brighter than the glorious sun that shone brightly down onto the makeshift rink in the country.

Family Day. What a great concept!

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....

Frantic Friday : The BadBlood wants it Edition.... (Uhhhh....NSFW..... at all !)

This was a comment from our last Frantic Friday ;

"Very cool stuff, but if you could focus more on thongs and asses next Friday, it'd be cool with me." -BadBlood

Now since I kinda' like the guy AND he's invited me down to South Cackalacky for some poker, drinks and a party, I see no reason not to give him what he wants. So if today's Frantic Friday is more to your liking than say.... it would normally be, you could always do the clicky-on-da-linky-thingy and show my fellow BB da' love!



Now whenever you're trying to make a friend happy, don't you find that you end up always asking yourself the same question?


I mean, I know I can utilize all the :


material available on the web. That's a given. Maybe I could even focus on :


just to spice things up a tad. I do know one thing for certain however, I'll need to make sure I get all this done before my :


I can be so cranky when I don't get enough sleep!

Now let's see, BadBlood did say he wanted :


and thongs, and he wants them despite my known penchant for leaning towards the girls of :


where we all know that some special :


can really add to the :


But since this is his Special Edition of Frantic Friday, I should really try to find him some :


and see if I can keep it :


while surfing the intertubles for some quality :


Sorry, what's that?

Oh........ the "soft" & "clean" bits?

Yeah I know! I'm afraid I'll have to keep it on,( or near ) the "soft" & "clean" side just in case.

One never knows if there might be a :


out there, that doesn't appreciate true art when they see it!

If this is your first Frantic Friday dear reader, consider this your :


but don't worry, not only have we never had a :


but I promise not to leave you :


either !

Now while I was doing the google thing, looking for some incredibly :


I ran across a......... Hmmmmmmm.........

Let me see now,

It's a gaggle of Geese.
A murder of Crow.
A swarm of Bees.
A herd of Cattle.
A litter of Pups.
A pack of Wolves.
A rafter of Turkeys.

and naturally,

A party of Bloggers.

Hmmmmm..... soooooooooooo......

I guess I'll have to go with a "kiss" of Butt playing :


Finding them however, was obviously only a chance discovery.

I don't like to leave an awful lot to chance when I'm trying to be the friend I know I can be. So I went out and hired me some real professional types. Some specially trained :


Now those two did a bang-up job and lead me to this :


who seemed content in just :


for a new :


She did have :


and a few obvious :


but I can tell you for absoloute certain, she had a great grasp on :


So the "experts" didn't do too bad of a job at all, but they were a little light in the 'ass' and 'thongs' department I thought. So I had to let them go.

Now although I really hope that this Frantic Friday has more than met with your expectations my fellow BB, fear not! For I will exhaust the far reaches of the intertubes on your behalf if needed, in search of more 'ass' and 'thongs' for you. Just to make sure that your Friday's, are every bit as Frantic as you desire them to be.

In fact, I'll go ahead and let you in on a little bit of next weeks Frantic Friday too. But just a touch! Can't go ruining all the "creative License" of a Frantic Friday in just one day now, can we!

So here's a little bit of the extra research I'm working on right now!

I'm gonna' go down to the Beach just for you :


and I'm going to check under everything I find just lying around down there :


You know what Blood? I'm even going to do a couple of naughty things, that I probably shouldn't be doing at all!


But that's just me and how I roll for a good friend. You always know you can count on me, to take one for the team when needed!

So on that note, Happy Frantic Friday everyone !

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....
Mi más sincero agradecimiento por caer por ....
Mein aufrichtiger Dank für Drop von ....